New shows! New shows! OK, they’re new Fox shows, but still. It’s a nice, slow warm-up for your DVR before next week’s deluge of new and returning broadcast network programming. Meanwhile, here’s what caught my eye on television this week:
Sunday: “The 2014 Miss America Competition,” 8 p.m., ABC: Since it’s year 93 for the pageant, I think they might give the title to a hot 93-year-old.
“Anthony Bourdain Parts Unknown,” 8 p.m., CNN: The second season kicks off. I wish I could tell you where Tony is traveling, but what part of “Parts Unknown” don’t you understand?
“The Newsroom,” 9 p.m., HBO: Season 2 ends as election night comes to a close.
Monday: “Dancing with the Stars,” 7 p.m., ABC: Jack Osbourne and Snooki are among Season 17’s competitors.
“Bones,” 7 p.m., Fox: Season 9 begins.
“Sleepy Hollow,” 8 p.m., Fox: Ichabod Crane wakes up in modern day New England in this bizarre and intriguing update of the Washington Irving tale.
Tuesday: “Dads,” 7 p.m., Fox: It’s never a good sign when commercials for a new series tell you to ignore the critics. Hey — it’s your call. But you’ve been warned.
“Brooklyn Nine-Nine,” 7:30 p.m., Fox: It’s like “Barney Miller,” but with Andy Samberg. OK, I guess it’s really not much like Barney Miller.
“New Girl,” 8 p.m., Fox: Who’s that girl? Who’s that girl? It’s Jess! Man, it’s only been a couple of months. Work on that memory, bro. Season 3 begins tonight.
“The Mindy Project,” 8:30 p.m., Fox: James Franco guest stars in the second-season opener.
Wednesday: “Survivor,” 7 p.m., CBS: Season 27 pits former castaways against their loved ones.
“Key & Peele,” 9:30 p.m., Comedy Central: A third season of the popular sketch comedy show named after what people do to the paint job on my car begins.
Thursday: “Million Second Quiz,” 7 p.m., NBC: 999,997 … 999,998 … 999,999 … the first season is over!
Friday: “Last Man Standing,” 7 p.m., ABC: Mike preps for a moose hunt in the third-season opener. I hope he leaves that cute flying squirrel alone.
“The Neighbors,” 7:30 p.m., ABC: Season 2 begins. No, I’m not joking. Yeah, I can’t believe it got renewed either.
“Shark Tank,” 8 p.m., ABC: Lori and Barbara compete for deals with entrepreneurs for the first time in the Season 5 kick-off.
Saturday: “2013 Primetime Creative Arts Emmy Awards,” 8 p.m., FXX: You know those awards they don’t show in the main Emmy ceremony for, like, “Best Innovation in Lens Cap technology?” They hand some of those out here.
“Secret Sex Lives: Swingers,” 9 p.m., Discovery Fit & Health: Next week — monkey bars and slides.